The Quiet Room

The Quiet Room has really opened my eyes to how schizophrenia is experienced not only by the person who is diagnosed with it but also by family, friends, strangers, and medical professionals.

Lori Schiller's story is one that I first read about twelve years ago. I was looking for a good book to read about schizophrenia because I enjoy reading books about people who struggle/live with mental illness. I had just read When Rabbits Howl by Truddi Chase (after seeing her on the Oprah show), and I wanted something that was different from what was then called multiple personality disorder (now called disassociative identity disorder), and I found The Quiet Room. From the first moment I read her writing, I was hooked. Here are a few of her words from an article I found:

"I remember little of what happened in my life in the past eight years -- probably because of 21 shock treatments. I suppose it's a lot like an alcoholic's blackout. Life seems dark, scary and fragmented. I battled strange, ominous Voices and Sights in a forever tormented day-to-day nightmare. I couldn't get relief from my psychotic world. I wanted to die desperately in an effort to free myself from this world. The first time I heard those derogatory Voices was as a teenager. I didn't know what was happening to me. I felt like I was possessed, and my mind was infected by demonic spirits.


I was afraid to tell anyone about the Voices for fear of being carried off by the "white coats." Imagine being a 15 year-old kid hearing the words over and over again: "You must die. You will die." And, imagine a naive little squirt keeping the echoing vicious Voices inside of herself for many, many years without sharing the pain and fright with anyone. Eventually, I entered the "revolving door" into the so-called mental health system. The doctors, so dapper and professional in their psychiatric style and attire, told my parents that I was a paranoid schizophrenic who had little chances of getting better. My diagnosis was just another "sick chronic psychiatric patient" to be shoved away forever in some hospital. I can imagine how crushed my parents were, with their ignorance about mental illness and suffering along with me. But they didn't give up hope. Never."
http://www.schizophrenia.com/newsletter/1296/1296schiller.htm

Though I have never dealt with schizophrenia, I have struggled with depression (both situational and clinical) and anxiety disorder. I have attended counseling (individual and group), taken medications, and read many books on the subject. This year, I was part of a self-acceptance panel sponsored by NMU's Women for Women group, where I spoke about being a successful professional who lives with anxiety/depression. The response I received was very positive, and it reaffirmed my desire to teach this class as one focused on mental health issues. I believe that reading about these issues helps people to break down the stigma attached to them.